I've joked before about what I would do with an extra One Hundred Grand--spend it on a law degree, that's what--but now that Sarah Palin has spent $150,000 on clothes at Saks Fifth Avenue and Neiman Marcus, I thought I'd do the same.
Except, you know, in the pretend shopping world. The world where sales tax does not exist.
When I started this post, I actually thought it was going to be fun. I'd just pick some expensive couture and add up the bill. It was not fun. It was actually a huge pain in the ass. We're talking about a boatload of clothes. I've never been much of a shopper anyway, so this just became an ultra-tedious task. Do you realize how many wool hounds-tooth dresses there are at Saks, all of which look practically identical?
Here it is: what I would be wearing had the RNC picked me as the Vice Presidential Candidate. What? I could have been picked. I have more formal education than Sarah, I can see Russia on a map, and I know some Supreme Court cases, too. I have a cute haircut. Totally qualified, my friends.
Armani Collezioni Raised Seam Tweed Jacket and Paperbag Pants $2190
Tahari Houndstooth Skirtsuit $598
Which puts us at $33,300. We have a long way to go, friends.
Prada Capretto Classic Pumps $430
Judith Ripka Basket Weave Bracelet $850
Jimmy Choo Riki Crushed Patent Bag $1750
Marc Jacobs Palais Royale Calf Bag $850
Valentino Bow Clutch $895
Bottega Veneta Atene Ayers Bucket Bag $3950
Ippolita Sterling Silver Snowman Disc Earrings $225
Bvlgari Round Fireworks Sunglasses $390
Burberry Cashmere Ribbon Muffler $495
Christian Louboutin Cancan Satin Clutch $1215
Yves Saint Laurent Minaudiere Satin Clutch $1395
Chloé New Heloise Bowler Bag $2030
Roberto Coin Diamond Earrings $1800
Adriana Orsini Jumbo Hoop Earrings $200
$93,827. Now, this is just boring.
Fuck it. Look, I'm buying everything Dior because a) it's really cute and b) it's really, really expensive.
I'm getting lazy, so you can go see it all here if you are seriously interested in prices for this stuff. Now we're at $119,242.
I've grown tired of shopping for myself. I don't want to shop for Will (boys clothes are even more boring than girls clothes, plus, give me a break, Will does not give two hoots about clothes at Saks) and I don't have any Pipers or Bristols running around to clothe in ultra-expensive couture garb. So, now I'm shopping for Michelle, my law school friend. She likes Dolce and Gabbana. Okay then.
All this can be found here.
We're only up to $129,137, so I am now going to blow a wad of cash on Manolos.
That was fun, but only cost about $7000.
Clothes: $150,000
Makeup Artist, per week: $11,400
Hair Stylist, per week: $5,000
A candidate who is no longer "just one of us"? Priceless.
Holy shit. That is a lot of stuff. I don't know what I expected, but that -- that is a LOT of stuff. (And until you got lazy, it was all way cuter than Palin's clothes. Kudos.)
Posted by: Teej | October 30, 2008 at 05:23 PM
You forgot some of your qualifications...your time you worked in the political machine and your time as a teacher. The teacher time is very important. I think Robotics Advisor is equal to being hockey mom.
Posted by: maggienwilly | October 30, 2008 at 07:06 PM
that is ridiculous!
I cant stand that bitch,
but I absolutely LOVE you!
Posted by: kathryn | October 30, 2008 at 07:09 PM
Wow, that is just mind boggling. Makes me want to be nominated for VP. I too have more formal education.
Posted by: Janssen | October 30, 2008 at 08:00 PM
In her defense, the RNC bought those clothes for her and according to them, they'll be donating them to charity. They apparently felt they needed to get her better clothes for settings she'd be in. Extravagant, yes, but it wasn't her idea. But I love your little experiment on here. You can get a lot for $150 grand!
Posted by: Laura | October 30, 2008 at 09:03 PM
$150k sounds like a lot, but I hadn't really thought about how much it could actually buy. Now I'm shocked. Who even needs that many suits/pants/blouses/shoes?
Posted by: The Maiden Metallurgist | October 31, 2008 at 07:57 AM
jeez, that's a lot of money (and a shit-ton of clothes) this experiment seems more difficult than one of my math problems.
As for your qualifications: sorry, but you're just too young. Yup, that's what separates you from the office, your youth. Honestly I'd take the latter.
hehe
Posted by: Benji | October 31, 2008 at 08:36 AM
I'm glad Benji reminded you, THAT YOU'RE TOO YOUNG TO BE V.P.! I'd expect a budding constitutional scholar to know the qualifications, you silly thing. BESIDES! You'd NEVER wear high heels!
Posted by: Michele | October 31, 2008 at 09:26 AM
omg this is by far the best blog post ever!!! i am a shopper by nature and would have started to cry that i couldn't actually by all of this stuff. and yes, after a while, it would get difficult to find stuff. i honestly think that the amount "she" (or did they have a personal shopper) spent was a bit ridiculous. but if it was a personal shopper, then they buy more than necessary and take what wasn't liked back or donate it....
Posted by: jeorg | October 31, 2008 at 12:16 PM
Interesting to see what $150,000 on clothes will get you. I'm amazed. Thank you for spending the time to put this together!
Posted by: jenvictoria | October 31, 2008 at 12:54 PM
I cant even imagine how much time it took you to write this post! I want to go find the charity she is planning on donating these clothes to (yeah, right. she is totally gonna keep them) and stand in line.
Posted by: alfredsmom | November 01, 2008 at 03:28 PM
This was so interesting!! And it must have taken HOURS to do your pretend shopping and then make this post. Love that first dress by Rebecca Taylor. You know you would have made a much more stylish VP candidate. With way cuter hair!!
Posted by: Lesli | November 02, 2008 at 06:13 PM
GREAT post!
Posted by: ɹǝƃƃolquǝʞoʇ | November 03, 2008 at 09:23 AM
First time visitor, here via Flooded Lizard Kingdom. Fantastic post!
Posted by: Candace | November 04, 2008 at 07:42 AM
So, I know it's not the point of this post (which I totally agree with, and couldn't be more pleased of last night's presidential election results).
But! That world you speak of - the one with no sales tax - it exists. Just head north on Oregon. :)
Posted by: Trigger | November 05, 2008 at 01:34 PM
As a guy who has no idea how you'd spend $150,000 on clothing, this is very illuminating.
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what I would be wearing had the RNC picked me as the Vice Presidential Candidate. What? I could have been picked. I have more formal education than Sarah, I can see Russia on a map, and I know some Supreme Court cases, too. I have a cute haircut. Totally qualified, my friends.
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